There’s a scene in the first season of Shameless where Fiona is leaving a horrible day and walking down the sidewalk in the snow. It’s apparent she feels alone and frustrated, shameless messy tears and all. Her man magically pulls up beside her, parks the car in the right lane, literally runs out of the car and romantically embraces her.
It’s moments like that, that are real and rare, but nonetheless television makes you envy. Moments that I catch myself dreaming up after my own bad days. That maybe, magically, Sammy might pull up alongside me walking the four lane Lasalle Street or while I’m trying to hail a cab in the pouring Spring rain.
I convince myself once a month that Sammy’s surprising me that day. I make sure to shave my legs and wear waterproof mascara. I make sure my bra and panties match. I throw out last week’s kale I failed to Vitamix as much as I’d hoped. I’m never resentful when he doesn’t show up to surprise me, after all I fully know it’s not possible. There’s still a part of me that’s bummed.
It takes a different kind of strength to remind myself that what we have IS a fairytale and undoubtably magical. The typical movie scene embraces and silliness I admire might not be realistic, but there’s so much special that deserves credit of it’s own.
This Valentine’s Day was the first Valentine’s Day Sammy and I have spent together, EVER, and we’ve been dating since 2009. We were staying with friends in Orlando, and I quietly snuck to the restroom at 6am. When I tip-toed back I was smirking in glory that Sammy hadn’t moved and was still sound asleep. I slowly leaned back onto my pillow and crunched on something hard. I reached under my head to find a red envelope. The sweetest message written in the sweetest card in the most thoughtful delivery. Way freaking better than roses.
Things aren’t always Nicholas Sparks. Not even close. Your tearjerker moments might not involve, “If you’re a bird I’m a bird”, but are worth recognizing. The little in betweens of life are so much more special than the charades. When distance and loneliness has me momentarily doubt how special my relationship is, Sammy quickly brings me back to reality. Even the best stories have moments of normal and we’re making our own movie. One I’m proud to star in. Call me cheesy, I like Velveeta.
Love you Sammy Palace.